Saturday, March 01, 2008

Home Cummins, Part 3.

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You know the drill by now - scroll down and read Part 1 and then Part 2 if you haven't already or you will be completely lost.

Retrospect: Mid-September 2006
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We ignored the first hint of a cold dawn as it back-lit the condensate on the truck windows by burying our heads deeper into our light jackets. Trying to move sent a xylophone riff of pain down our cramped spines and out into our stiff limbs. Aside from letting in a blast of chilling air, a quick roll-down of the window made it clear that the creek was STILL running hard. It would be hours more before the sun warmed the canyon air around us or slowed the creek.

We stirred and felt obliged to be social when we heard two trucks draw near around 9AM.
The two drivers stopped well short of us, trudged through the brush to inspect the creek and promptly left, purposefully avoiding any eye contact or acknowledgment. Unlike the well-end workers, we've found the pipeline company workers to be consistently aloof and occasionally a detriment (as noted in an earlier story of getting the Ram stuck in the creek). We suspect that there is no 'good neighbor policy' in place in these pipeline corporations.
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There was no way we could force a return to napping at this late stage of the morning so we had to make decisions. The kitty boys were safe inside the Rat but my concern for Brou was building furiously. When Mark volunteered to walk across the creek and head home, I declined. Nursing an old phobia about driving other people's vehicles, I declared that it would be me who walked home and that he would ferry the new truck across when the waters subsided.
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I scraped a good amount of muck off my shoes with a stout sage branch and placed them in a plastic shopping bag along with my socks. Since my straight-cut jeans would not roll up very far, they were placed in the bag on top of newspaper serving as a mud barrier. I marched resolutely down the slope to the creek, bag in hand, turning only once to announce "Okay, now if I fall down in the creek and you laugh ... well, you know ..." By the time I was on the far side and realizing that I was facing this walk alone, he had already returned to the truck and was deeply engrossed in his newspapers. Hmpphhh. Fine! I then looked down at the mud which had oozed up in quantity from between my toes - it would obviously be awhile before I could put my jeans and shoes back on. A great spectacle to behold; me, the great cross country adventurer, pushing on in my bare feet and underwear. "Did Lewis and Clark ever do this?" I wondered to myself.
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It was about a quarter of a mile into this trek that two things happened. The first was a nature call of the most pressing kind. Oh, surely NOT now - I'm barefooted with this gimpy knee and there is no sign of any suitable seating arrangement to aid in this suddenly urgent mission. Not wanting to tread into the brush in such a vulnerable state of dress, I trudged on for another hundred yards but succumbed to sheer desperation. I planted myself for business in an area barely off the road after surveying for snakes and tarantulas ... and so grateful for that section of newspaper in the plastic bag. The second thing to happen (of course - as you probably could have guessed) was the sudden roar of an approaching truck from up the road ahead. Great; I am unshod, in my underwear and in the middle of addressing a dump. Such would appear to be the story of my life at times.
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To be continued

This is consuming more words than I had planned so I'm cutting it short here to go back to the elk processing now. I am beginning to truly resent that beast, I really am. I'll be back and visiting as soon as I finish pounding that vile and taunting creature into submission, promise!!!

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17 comments:

fuzzbert_1999@yahoo.com said...

OMG...I'm gettin' a clear visual on this. I was gettin' turned on by the visual until the "pangs" began becoming evident in your words.

This is priceless my dear...priceless! I can imagine the rest, but I curiously await your next post!

BTW, if you go to my blog, please don't miss my Part 2...I wanted you to see my son...at 14!

Lin said...

Sorry about that suddenly squished visual, Mushy - reality can suck terribly at times, especially out here.

Waiting to throw one of our Saturday Night Special pizzas in the oven. Severe gluttony to follow and then I will be over pronto. Can't wait to see the young Mushy 2!

phlegmfatale said...

oooh, you're SO sadistic!
Making us wait!

It's a great story, though, and I'm loving how you've winnowed it out so we get to savor the thought of what you experienced. Nice tale!

LBJ said...

What a great story to start my morning. And there's more to come? Awesome.

Anonymous said...

Lin, you are one hell of a good writer. I'm sure you've heard that a million times before. Now it's a million and one.

If you make all this into a book you could become a millionaire.

Buck said...

Such would appear to be the story of my life at times.

And SUCH a story it is... ;-)

alphonsedamoose said...

I m sitting here laughing at that thought of you in such a predicament and only with your undies. Sorry. NO , I'm not LOL

Lin said...

Phlegmmy, yeah, I be bad like that ... just ask the family.
And see .. just for you, I rushed the final part out today. Hope you like it!

Lin said...

Lin, so you like a bit of a read to start the day, too? I wish we had electricity 24/7 - I'd LOVE to hit a couple of blogs first thing to jump start groggy synapses.

Lin said...

Babzy, actually I haven't heard that all that much so keep telling me - I LOVE it! And it is incredibly encouraging.

I'm waiting on detective Blaze to hit the presses and then I might, just might venture out myself!

Lin said...

Buck, interesting times and misadventure seem to find me whether I like it or not but it sure gives us some good laughs and campfire tales.

Lin said...

Moose, if you would have laughed and then felt guilty about it, I would have been SO disappointed.

phlegmfatale said...

I lurved it, Lin - thanks for the rush job!

Lin said...

Phlegmmy, ya hit me just right so I had to finish up this tale ASAP.

FHB said...

Too funny. The of life trucks always seem to come by when your nickers are around your ankles, don't they? I'll move on now to the next episode.

Lin said...

FHB, not like we weren't warned by everybody out here: if you think you're the only one out here for ten miles in any direction, even taking a simple whizz will bring on a parade of vehicles. Must be a Murphy's Law or something, I swear!

Catmoves said...

I can't get rid of this mental picture of you trying to be demure with your britches around your ankles. Did Mark get any pics of that episode? Inquiring minds on Utube want to know.